[[ kathel ]] seek .

Departure.

2011-08-14T19:25:00.000-07:00

It has been a long time since I've blogged.

I have experienced many life experiences since I stopped. I guess I felt a hinge of regret that I did not jot them down for memories later.

Life is fragile.

As much as being reluctant to say good bye to my aunt, I have to. I believe she feels reluctant to leave too, with her heart still worrying about her young kids, and her love still burning for her husband and family.

I believe everyone will be strong.

Rest in peace Jiu Mu.

Rest in peace to my tai ma too.
Great Mother of 5 generations.

Friends

2010-06-06T06:54:00.000-07:00

伍思凱 - 分享

dear Friends:
I miss you.

下一站，幸福我以為

2010-03-17T07:14:00.000-07:00

你曾说不想有天让我知道
你对他有那么好
你说会懂我的失落
不是靠宽容
就能够解脱
我以为
我出现的时候刚好
你和他正说要分开
我以为你
已对他不再期待
不纵容他再给你伤害
我以为我的温柔
能给你真的愉悦
我以为我能全力
填满你感情缺口
专心陪在你左右
弥补他一切的错
也许我太过天真
以为奇迹会发生
★ MUSIC ★
我以为终究
你会慢慢明白
他的心不在你身上
我的关心
你依然无动于衷
我的以为只是我以为
我以为我的温柔
能给你真的愉悦
我以为我能全力
填满你感情缺口
专心陪在你左右
弥补他一切的错
也许我太过天真
以为奇迹会发生
他让你红了眼眶
你却还笑着原谅
原来你早就想好
你要留在谁身旁
我以为我够坚强
却一天天地失望
少给我一点希望
希望就不是奢望
我以为我的温柔
能给你真的愉悦
我以为我能全力
填满你感情缺口
专心陪在你左右
弥补他一切的错
也许我太过天真
以为奇迹会发生
他让你红了眼眶
你却还笑着原谅
原来你早就想好
你要留在谁身旁
我以为我够坚强
却输得那呢绝望)
少给我一点希望
希望就不是奢望

Life?

2010-02-14T20:05:00.001-08:00

sometimes, things just dont go the way you want it to be.
i have no faith for this exam.
my future looks bleak.

Happy new year people.

Joan Jett - I Hate Myself For Loving You

2010-01-29T06:32:00.000-08:00

Joan Jett - I Hate Myself For Loving You

Midnight gettin' uptight Where are you
You said you'd meet me now it's quarter to two
I know I'm hangin' but I'm still wantin' you
Hey Jack It's a fact they're talkin' in town
I turn my back and you're messin' around
I'm not really jealous don't like lookin' like a clown
I think of you ev'ry night and day
You took my heart then you took my pride away
I hate myself for loving you
Can't break free from the the things that you do
I wanna walk but I run back to you that's why
I hate myself for loving you
Daylight spent the night without you
But I've been dreamin' 'bout the lovin' you do
I won't be as angry 'bout the hell you put me through
Hey man bet you can treat me right
You just don't know what you was missin' last night
I wanna see your face and say forget it just from spite
I think of you ev'ry night and day
You took my heart then you took my pride away
I hate myself for loving you
Can't break free from the the things that you do
I wanna

Jiayou

2010-01-27T01:11:00.000-08:00

林俊杰- 加油 Lyrics

最近你好吗少了一点微笑
说的话有点少
最近我也不好全世界都在逆转
人开始反向思考

发现你爱的人到处跑
昨晚刚升职今天被炒
莫名其妙谁会知道
是不是上天开的玩笑

地震时你想和谁拥抱
什么是生命中的美好
轻易放掉却不知道
幸福就在下一个转角

说一声加油一切更美好
所有的悲伤请往边靠
曾经流过的泪
湿了伤口就让阳光晒干而褪

这一种加油人人都需要
手牵手我们一起赛跑
说好不见不散
每分每秒守候你到老

The beat goes on 时间它一直走
就像是Life goes on 这过程或许痛
不管顺流或逆流你总得抬起头
让我们一起走走过艰难和困惑

发现你爱的人到处跑
昨晚刚升职今天被炒
莫名其妙谁会知道
是不是上天开的玩笑

地震时你想和谁拥抱
什么是生命中的美好
轻易放掉却不知道
幸福就在下一个转角

说一声加油一切更美好
所有的悲伤请往边靠
曾经流过的泪
湿了伤口就让阳光晒干而褪

这一种加油人人都需要
手牵手我们一起赛跑
说好不见不散
每分每秒守候你到老

关关是难关但我们关关过
雨后天晴的阳光在天空闪闪
所出现的彩虹忽然间我们才懂
如果这是一场马拉松那我们一起加油

说一声加油一切更美好
所有的悲伤请往边靠
曾经流过的泪
湿了伤口就让阳光晒干而褪

这一种加油人人都需要
手牵手我们一起赛跑
说好不见不散
每分每秒守候你到老

Jiayou dear dear!

2010

2010-01-02T10:10:00.000-08:00

Resolutions

1. Do well for last sem

2. Get a good job

3. Save more $$

4. Start being more alert and less qi-si-ren

5. Eat healthy. Have a healthy lifestyle

6. Be healthy and happy

2009 zoomed pass before i even finish typing this sentence.

This year had been alittle more special,

having someone else spending 3/4 of 2009 with me.

i will want this to carry on for the many more year to come (:

I've received some this year, but i've lost some too.

Definitely, i've lost more youth, i'm nineteen! (argh)

i've lost some 'closeness' with some friends,

but i've still managed to keep most of them with me, and still going on well (:

I hope this year will be a better year.

I really hope.

Whoever reading this, please hope that i'll get a good 2010 okays?

diet

2009-10-17T02:14:00.000-07:00

i find this rather funny. hahas. (:

Always there for u

2009-09-28T06:24:00.000-07:00

Just Stand Up

This song is especially for Alvin Neo.
Don't give up! (:(:(:

Introducing TIPMedia.Net!!

2009-09-26T07:29:00.000-07:00

Introducing TIPMedia.Net!!

Their little trailer ;)
What is TIPMedia.Net?!
It's a blog run by 2 Business IT students from Ngee Ann Poly, which takes its readers through their 6-month attachment. Besides documenting their (hopeful)progress, they'll post up useful links, some interesting encounters, and everything else that grants them the title 'Peeps-With-Issues'.

What the FRUITPASTE is 'TIP'?
It stands for Technopreneurship Incubation Programme. Still don't understand what it is?

Neither do they!!

All they know is that they've gotta create an IT Business, with planned side projects of IT Awareness and Community Service. They need your help in commenting, and maybe even chip in some ideas that you may have!

Follow them as they take you to new heights of utilizing the web to the fullest! Or just watch out for their crazy escapades in search of success as technopreneurs!

How can you say no to faces like this?

They'll be waiting for you!

http://TIPMedia.net

i feel i've grown up.

2009-08-30T03:39:00.000-07:00

my 6 months attachment has ended. i have successfully found myself another part time job to last me till school reopens.

after these 6 months, i realised i feel that i am thinking deeper now. i have learnt to look at things at a different angle. i have learnt and am now able to look into the future. for the next five years, at least.

i am happy and i feel more assured now that i have a goal to achieve and a road i've planned to guide me, rather then the aimless follower i was at the beginning of the year.

after i graduate, i will take up a job, study part time for my ACCA, then maybe look for somewhere better after that. i give myself 2 years.

initially, i had thought of giving up this diploma i am pursuing. as in, after i graduate, i most probably wouldnt relate my jobs to it. it has never been a doubt that i am still no good in maths. i am still having a phobia over accounts/mathematical related stuff.

there were a few times i regretted taking up Accountancy, but the now more 'matured' me has instead, felt relieved i pursued this diploma with future prospects. i understand i may not excel in it, mayb not so in my future jobs too, but i will try my best and learn. it won't be that tough, right?

i know what i want, what to aim for now. it's going to be tough, but i'll hang on.

i know there's someone else who has to go through some hardship for a few years too. i hope we'll hang in there together (: we will hang in there together (: (:

yes, i feel i know who are the people around me i need to treasure too. not just my family or loved one, but also my friends. seriously and frankly, i miss alot of them. the chicken, the pig, the euphos, the big 7.
i miss the times about 4 years back. omg. i typed 4 years. it's been so long.
i hope all are happy and well, with what they are doing now.

teachers' day's coming soon too. i miss a handful of teachers too.

Well, back to the life i am having now, there's actually something that i feel i very much want to have now- a driving license.

i've no idea why the sudden urge for it, but i believe it will benefit me in future. sadly, i've not enough capital in my bank, and i have to save up for a number of things meanwhile. i'll see what i can do about that.

tada.

p.s: people, i've lost a number of contacts from my mobile as it died on me a few months back. i hope those whom would still read this or know about this to maybe drop me a message and let me know their number so i can save it. and, do attach ur name. thank you!

What do you see?

2009-08-09T21:24:00.000-07:00

it's 44th National Day yesterday.
i kind of like this year's national day song.
(: Happy Birthday Singapore.

I've come to the end of my internship.
4 more days to go.
i kind of feel reluctant...
cos it means, back to school.
it means, i'm going to graduate.
im going to step out into the real working society.

i still feel lost on where to go.
what type of job to work as.
Accounts?
im actually not very good in it.

well..
never mind.
things will work out when the time comes.
(:

郭静《在树上唱歌》

2009-07-31T20:28:00.000-07:00

be careful people

2009-06-19T19:30:00.000-07:00

Hello people!
long since i've last blogged. hahas

was clearing my email, wanted to share some stuff.

it's stated in an email that
- we must not help anyone, except those very close to us, to put joss stick into the joss stick holder. This is a way for people to borrow 'foetus'. so, be careful.
-do not give anyone your socks! or even worst, take their money after giving them your socks. bad people who wants your socks can foster little ghosts that can harm people.

i've actually received this email before, but after reading it for the 2nd time, i realised that this is something that relates alot to everyday life.
so be mindful of such stuffs.
take care people.
(:(:(:

the wait is over!!

2009-05-20T05:31:00.000-07:00

Not all scars show, not all wounds heal. Sometimes you can't always see, the pain someone feel...
i will heal your wounds, i will seal the scars. i want you to let me know, the pain you are going through.
we will go through everything together.
(:
(:

TGIF

2009-05-15T04:33:00.000-07:00

it's friday!!!
okay. random

just here to drop a note.
wont stay for long.
going offline after i post this.

i need to countdown 6days!
this is agony.
:(:(:(

imy-

colour woof

2009-04-25T23:38:00.000-07:00

how is everyone doing?
Poly's new term has just started.
hope all is fine.

i am alright.
working every weekday,
_____ every weekend (:

next week is my last week to enjoy 3 days of break
till aug.

attachment is almost coming to 2 months.
been to east and west.
Boon Lay, Kallang, Tanah Merah.
wonder where is my next job going.
Red line hopefully?
=)

i dont know why i dont have much to talk about now.
oh wells.
i'll go off then.
byes all.

2mnths.
vin.

down.

2009-04-09T19:39:00.000-07:00

work's fine.
life's down.

it's a hard night to pass yesterday.
i thought alot.
i realised i've really been very selfish. very unfair.

what have i done to make everything end up like this.
i really hope i can have one more chance.
cos i really dont want to lose u.

not blogging

2009-03-22T08:21:00.000-07:00

tired of working life already. =/
exam results passed. but a steep drop in GPA.
but, passed sld be contented le.
wad a rough semester.

i have so much to say.
but when u tell me to say,
i dont know how to say.
whew.

pekchekness about ______.
nvm. fine.
i wont let it happen again.

2009-03-13T21:50:00.000-07:00

new

2009-03-06T07:18:00.000-08:00

one week of break is almost over.
monday is approaching in about 50hours' time.
am i ready? not very sure. =\

having a HUGE hole in my pocket now.
spent $100 on officewear. Zzz
so broke.

and seriously i look so short and fat in office wear...
sigh.

i dunno why the sudden 'bomb' in size in me.
too long without exercise?
i guess so.
argh.

anyway..
i realise im facing huge risks of having stroke and heart disease.
*touchwood* i know, but im afraid too.
went for volunteer work on last weekend,
at IMM; Free health checkup for public.

did blood pressure and obesity screening for myself too.
i have high fat contents in my body. -.-

anyway, when i was free and was reading through a brochure,
i saw the symptoms of stroke and heart disease in women.
want to know?

1. Shoulder Pain
2. Gas like pain in the stomach.
3. Headaches.
etc...

i think there was about 6 listed there.
i have the above 3.
50% risk?

i think im rather afraid of being sick.
as in too sick.
i dont like the idea of being admitted into hospital.
it's scary.

so i hope i can live healthier, and hopefully decrease my risks.
I hope everyone else will be healthy and happy too.

anyway anyway,
i realised i've changed quite alot.
there's actually another side of me that i think all of those close to me dont know
even those i've personally met before or spent some time whether at work or school with.
it's not a very good side, i after some 'counselling' yesterday,
i've decided to throw away that hidden me.
throw it far far away, bury it deep down into the heart.
dont say it out to anyone anymore.

and, im determined. (:
wish me luck.

anyway, Dino has a new image. (:

i had a weird dream.

2009-02-27T03:25:00.000-08:00

my 3 hr nap on wednesday after MA paper, i had a weird dream.

i dreamt that i went out with a friend, and when we parted at the bus stop and i was waiting for my bus, a guy dressed in school uniform approached, and with a tissue paper in hand, started to wipe a secondary school girl's neck from the back. (eew!)

after the girl found out, she became scared and ran away, telling that guy to stay away from her.
That guy listened, and walk a few steps away, just when i took a glance a him.
so, he approached me, and hold me up, like this:

it's actually at my legs. not body. then, he told me to look across the street at the bus stop opposite and see who is that person in black. but as i was heavy and he didnt hold me too high up from the ground, i could only see the road infront of me, upside down.
so, i told him i cant see.

Then, he repeated his question. so i told him to hold higher. he did, but as i was too heavy, he couldn't hold too high up.

in the end, he decided to hold me up like this:

he asked me to look, but in a few seconds, i immediately turned 180degrees and became like this: (again)

when i was turned 180degrees, my hair brushed against the floor. i was so scared i will die under his hand 'cause my head might just bang against the floor, so i start to scold him:

" you better be careful hor, i dont want to die like that"

then, i was awakened by the door bell.
LOLs. i wonder what happened to me in the end.

done

2009-02-27T03:16:00.000-08:00

hello.
didnt update yesterday.
here i am today (:(:

that's all for school,
now's preparation for internship.
6months.
say long not long,
say short not short either.

somehow,
i feel reluctance to leave school.
im so going to miss people.
& i wont be able to see me seniors graduate.
:(

next year, it'll be my turn.
time zooms.

this semester hasnt been the smoothest semester for me,
it got bumpy towards the end.
and immediately affected my exams.

MA paper killed me. im just hoping for a C.
though i desperately want a B.

RFA paper, im hoping for a B too,
though i think it's a C. :(

GPA's going to drop like hell this semester.
sigh.

internship starting soon,
im so scared.
not as in scared scared.
but- i dont know how to explain but use 'scared' scared.
blahs.

i cant believe im going to be clad in super formal shirt.
i think i'll just look weird.
like a child in her mother's clothing. =x
look super ugly.

february's ending.
2009 is 2 months gone.
woah.

Jolinne's birthday is coming.
wad should i get her?
hahs.

alright.
i'll be gone.
take care people.
for those who need jiayous,
JIAYOU!!!

'Bpull'

2009-02-23T07:45:00.000-08:00

often, i imagine myself talking to you.
some times, i will feel happier.
most of the time, i just feel worst off.

history repeated itself on this fateful day,
23feb09

im just feeling more and more hopeless.
anyway... 1yr's coming.

emotions are taking the better of me.
i just cant control them.
tell me how?

RFA, duel with you tomorrow.
i hope u are weak tomorrow
so i can beat you mightily
=)
mk can do it right?

count

2009-02-21T05:56:00.000-08:00

countdown with me to end of exams!!!
5days to go.

Go mk go!!! (:(:

dino, cheer me up.

2009-02-19T04:46:00.000-08:00

dino came in first today (:

dino is heart

2009-02-18T03:10:00.000-08:00

my dino is dirty, but still smiling.

LOL

seeing dino brightens me up alittle.

why am i emo-ing

2009-02-18T03:00:00.001-08:00

why?
good question.
beats me.

emotions are stirring inside me now.
101 feelings. 1001 thinking.

hmm.
firstly,
i would like to hope that everyone is healthy and well.
heard news that the NP MBIO guy passed away on Monday.
though i havent seen him before,
i realise the feeling of sadness still lingers in my mind till today.
rest in peace.

next,
please make Hasanah well and happy again.
Hasanah, Get Well Soon! (:(:(:

next next,
allow me to get over this exam period
quickly and smoothly.
i have seriously no mood to study today.
it just makes me Zzz.
i KNOW i should be studying.
every second im slacking,
there are people mugging real hard.
thinking of it runs a chill down my spine.
:\

i feel terrible today.
for im-not-sure-why.

yesterday was fine.
till maybe night time that i get all these feelings.
:(

let's hope mk brightens up real soon,
and set my engine up for study again.
STUDY !!

rights.
please answer my prayers.
take care all.

the day of love

2009-02-13T09:05:00.000-08:00

Lily Allen - Smile

HAPPY VALENTINE's DAY!!!
this song is quite nice.
the tune as in.
the lyrics seems alittle cruel,
but to a little extent, true.

Black 13. but yellow for me (:

2009-02-13T07:29:00.000-08:00

today is my most productive day since the start of exam break.
whew!

completed FIT (more or less)
tomorrow i want to do MA.
prays for revision to be completed by exams.

i realised,
my home is a place for me to relax.
therefore,
i can NEVER study at home.

so i finally stepped out of my house today,
and went into mac- study!
more place to hunt for me to label as
'the best study escapade.'
=)

anyway,
attachment posting is out.
im so scared!!!
hahas.
going to a company behind Raffles Hotel.
AUDITOR here i come~

i wish i wish...
that i will get good colleagues,
great performance results,
fantastic supervisor..
and results flying with colours this semester.
(:(:(:

i love Mcspicy!
get well soon hasanah.
and the Jordan from MBIO
(though i dont know you.)
GET WELL SOON!
take care and rest lots okay.

My Birthday:
You are curious and a true follower. You can please someone so much that it seem like you are trying to charm that person. You hide your disagreement under your smiling face. This is a charming quality of yours. Your Love, You are quite unlucky in love. You are loved by someone you don't like while your dream person is so far away. Your love life is occasionally under turbulence. Sometimes you don't have the clear view of the guy/gal in your heart.
quite true.

omg~

2009-02-07T04:09:00.000-08:00

my dear nephews (:

& i cant live without this these few days :(

French Time!

2009-02-07T03:35:00.000-08:00

Salut.
(Hi)
Ca va?
(How are you?)
Je'mappelle Seek Meng Kui.
(I call myself Seek Meng Kui)
Je suis 18(dix-huit) ans, etudiante Ngee Ann Polytechnic.
(I am 18 years, a student in Ngee Ann Polytechnic.)
Je' parle chinois, anglais, et un peau francais.
( I speak chinese, english and a little french.)

Je suis petite, brune et serieuse (:
( i am short, dark haired and serious.)
J'ai grand, intelligent et travailleur monsieur.
( I like tall, intelligent and hardworking mister. (LOL!))

J'habite Singapour et je suis Singaporienne.
( I live in Singapore and i am Singaporean.)
ll y a un ordinateur, un lit, une table, une chaise et aussi television.
( There is a computer, bed, table, chairs and also television.)
J'aime sushi, green tea, et fish and chips.
( I like sushi, green tea, and fish and chips)
Je prefere bleue, verte, rouge et grise
( I prefer blue, green, red and grey.)
Je' port pantalon, un t-shirt, et sandales.
( I wear pants, a t-shirt and sandals.)
c'est bon marche. ce n'est pas cher.
( It is not expensive. It is cheap)
un t-shirt coute 10 (dix) Singapour dollar.
(A t-shirt costs S$10.)
D'accord.
(Okay.)
Enchante, Au revoir!
(Nice to meet you. Bye!)

Lol.
i am so worried about Monday's French written test.
i dont want to fail! so, i've typed a crazy post in french above.
hahas.
tried not to refer to my book,
but in the end i still did as there's alot of vocabulary i'm not sure yet.

alot more to go!!!
havent start my RFA though i promise myself to.
-.-

sudden urge to speak (to you)

2009-02-06T07:14:00.000-08:00

well

of course i know you wont be reading this.

u are occupying my mind more than how it was previously.

about a month before.

is this a good sign?

is it true that i've let go?

if it is, then why am i bothered?

if it is not, why not?

it's almost 8mnths gone.

perhaps it's because there's no one like you.

perhaps it's because i didnt stop the comparing test.

perhaps it's because... i dont know.

anyway...

school's almost over.

one more lecture,

one more mock test.

then im going to war again.
last war before attachment.

my childhood illness is back- stomachach.

my exams illness is back- sleepiness.

argh!!!

motivations please?

i hope things are brightening up for me.

mk will still be happy mk (:

im lovin' it!

Pancake day

2009-02-05T06:45:00.000-08:00

5th feb is pancake day (:

VIDEOS!

2009-02-01T05:07:00.000-08:00

1st February

2009-02-01T05:02:00.000-08:00

it's a new month!
year 2009 is left with 11more months.

hmms.
im low on productivity :(
did nothing much today.
rather disappointing.

shall work super hard next week to get ready for the exams.
i have a bad feeling.
like im going to do badly this semester.
(i hope this wont happen)

hope everyone is getting on fine.
jiayou to Jolinne, Elaine and Kee Hong.
keep going. Be strong.

shall share some interesting videos with you, my loyal fans.
LOL.

tata.

i love you

2009-01-27T06:52:00.000-08:00

new year's over.
it's time to get ready and dash for the finish line to this semester
with the coming of exams.
i will study hard.

this year's new year,
i've slept well.
relaxed well, after the hectic week.
i should say i am satisfied.

with the start of the 'new year',
there'll be alot of changes, and challenges to cross.
hopefully everyone gets to endure it smoothly.
(:(:(:(:

all the best, keehong.
jiayou.
and jolinne tang. hang in there!

toy food

2009-01-27T06:39:00.000-08:00

TOY FOOD
like real food but is toy.

TOY FOOD
not real food do not eat.

moo year is here.

2009-01-25T08:48:00.000-08:00

HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR!!! (: (: (:
okays..
it's the start and end of a busy period.

exams are coming!!
:(

my wishlist for 2009:
1. eat moderately. no binging if possible.
2. spend sparingly. dont spend on unnecessities.
3. be honest, wherever possible
4. plan my time properly.
that's all for now.

so relieved my crazy week is finally over.
im going to start concentrating on studies from now on.
hopefully i can keep my motivation going.
(:(:(:

i really really hope this would be a nice year ahead.
no more headach/____ach
no more financial problem.
smoothly let me finish my papers.
smoothly let me complete my internship.
smoothly let me find a job after my poly years.

jiayou mk!
jiayou everyone!!!

WHAT A DAY

2009-01-19T07:23:00.000-08:00

today is a BLUE MONDAY -.-
i got a virus on my MSN while doing an Elearning assignment.
then i took a wrong bus all the way to Marymount.
i almost fainted there.

what a way to add on to me 'happy' week.
lol.

lucky for me, monday is over.
byes.

P.s: can anyone tell me how to get the virus off? can uninstall MSN help?

WAARRGGGHH!!!!

2009-01-18T19:11:00.000-08:00

serious, this is going to be a CRAZY week.
i really cant breath. heavy load.
no breaks.

havent study for retest on Friday.
wish me luck.

may be giving up last minute :(

i wan to type alot but i have no time.
i wan to shout!

need a breather

2009-01-15T07:45:00.000-08:00

sigh.
there's just so many things to be done.
how i wish i can duplicate myself to complete all the undone stuffs.

no new year clothes this year i think :(
i have my accounting retest the friday before new year.
i have another event next tuesday.
i have my RFA quiz, Bcomm Table topic and FRENCH Speech next wed -.-
i haven ___________.
i need to clear my tutorials.
i need to start my retest revision!
omg
& worst of all,
i need my sleep.

help. help. help
i need some s____, c____,l_____ and c_____ too. and loads of m___
just that i dont mention it.
but well, it's okay.
MK IS STRONG!

i have craving for fried chicken. yum yum!!

all washed out

2009-01-13T06:49:00.000-08:00

i am so tired with all these crap going on.
there's just no time.
im so tired.
worn out.
:(

and i am so darn tired thinking, feeling and worrying that
some people are going to leave me soon.

table topic was fine. hope next week's will be better.

ARGH!

2009-01-07T04:50:00.000-08:00

sigh.
i failed my accounting paper for Common Test :(
disappointment, though i expected to fail, i didnt hope for it to happen. -.-

tomorrow and Friday's getting back MA and Tax paper. hopefully i pass.
today's Letter Writing test is scary too. i am so worried i wrote out of point.
Zzz.

i dont feel well too.
but im not sick.
i just feel warm, tired, and running low on energy.
what's happening to me.
it feels like as if i am having my energy sucked out of me.

aww....

No Pain No Gain, Accept the Pain, & the Future will be Fruitful...
Don't feel the work you are doing is pain, because there will be always a reason for that pain or work. So face the pain, for the pain you face, there will be definitely happiness a head.

i miss you two

2009-01-04T06:24:00.000-08:00

i suddenly realise i miss my nephew so much.

omg..

was looking through the photos we took.

sigh.

hope they are well there

and happy birthday to my eldest sister

school reopens tomorrow.

miseries.

hope i can endure this new school term safely.

omg!

common test results are coming back.

prays i dont fail any of the modules.

NP Open House 8-10 jan.

busy week next week.

need to skip lecture once more.

went outing with my 3 best buds.

i heart u people

you make the dark clouds light up

and make the sunny days brighter

photos will be posted asap.

French lesson tmr at 8am.

off to bed!

short sighted?

2008-12-31T23:43:00.000-08:00

Who do you see?

no short sighted: sees a female no matter what you do.

Short sighted: with specs, sees einstein. without specs... try it! (:

two zero zero nine

2008-12-31T23:39:00.000-08:00

HAPPY NEW YEAR 2009!
(:(:(:

it's the new year already.
i dunno how im feeling.
lols.
normal bah.

but i hope this year will be a greater better year for me.
and for everyone else!
=)

School's reopening.
argh
work undone.
same grumbles again.
hahas

alrights.
byebye!!

i am old already!

2008-12-28T06:24:00.000-08:00

hellos
so long no blog

have the urge to blog,
but when im here,
i dunno what to blog about anymore.
hahas

hmms.
school's reopening ):
a new year's coming :
i feel a certain dread in knowing a new year is coming.
'cause it feels like i've to live my days over again.
-.-
happy days i dont mind.
but those annoying and depressing days?
omigosh!

i hope this new year will be better.

New year resolutions?
1. mature. (think and act maturedly)
2. healthy, wealthier, happier
3. love?

i am so fat. argh!!!

till then!!! tata

WT** is Wrong?

2008-12-18T08:46:00.000-08:00

GET ME OUT OF MY MIS-ER-Y!!!
wow. feels good turning this super loud,
then will be able to shout like them huh.
should try it someday =D

you people are <3!!!

2008-12-18T08:20:00.001-08:00

wee!!
my day ended well.
(:(:(:(:

went to school in morning for Open House briefing.
ate 4 chocolates -.-
fats!
anyway...
it cheered me up quite abit.
things are just different with Illias calling "Emkay" everywhere.
lol.

met shi ting for shopping.
Hello Shi Ting!
Hello Shang Yuan!
hopefully you all will see this post. lols

then had buffet at Sakae...
it's a nice gathering. hahas.

GOOD/BAD News.
im officially "sacked"
serious i dont know if this is good or bad.

but
thanks alot for the encouragements and support Shi Ting and Shang Yuan.
(: it meant alot to me and im feeling a whole load better.

thank u jtsc for bugging me to tell u why was i emo-ing though i dont want to.
but im really better now (:(:(:(:

omg. i love you people(:
the year is coming to an end already..

this year, i've experienced alot.
happiest, saddest, toughest etc.
though the happiness were short and saddest unbearable,
i've overcomed them and i should say im proud of myself?

i've disappointed some, hurt some, neglected some...
sorry to those i've hurt or left out.

i hope 2009 will be a better better better year for me.
better at work, better at studies, better in health,
better in wealth. better in relationships (family, friends etc)

i'll try harder to be stronger.
i'll try harder to be warmer to me family members.
thanks alot for putting up with my poor attitude at home.
especially to me younger sister.
i know i've not been too good to you.

those that should be forgotten, i'll try to forget them.
those meant to be treasured, i'll try my best to keep them close.

i was thinking of u today.

2008-12-15T08:26:00.000-08:00

蕭亞軒 - 衝動

omg
i saw wrinkles on my forehead today.
horrors of horrors.
am i so old?

work again.
today was fine.
but no appointments.
-.-
stopping at end of year.

going to do something i think i am more interested in by 10 times.
lol

hmm.
feeling weird now.
dont know why.
what am i afraid of
is it because i havent open up again yet.
are things really how im thinking it as?
sorry...

shuddup

2008-12-11T06:30:00.000-08:00

just please stop quarrelling.
for goodness sake.
though i wasnt there when things happen,
u know how i get affected.

damn.
no mood to study now.
-.-

and i hope ___ wont have a 'relapse' again.
just hang in there.
u know many are just worried bt you.
not looking down on you.
so please please please take care of urself
and hang in there.

to ____ please dont grumble/ nag about things anymore.
i know u need to say it out. but once will do?
repeating it 5 times a day will just cause one/ me to go into
depression.

argh
peace.

nephews and sister going China for 6mnths on saturday.
havent visited my nephews though they are so near me
for 2 days le.
will go play with them tmr after my paper.
i think i'm so going to miss them.
:(
and im worried too.
the weather, the food, the adaptation.
but ____ wont listen
and there's nothing i can say.
just wish them fine.
happy and well.
healthy and blessed.

hope departure on saturday wont make me
vulnerable again.

long bus rides = <3>
today took 30 to Bedok.
almost 2hr ride.

pass by a japanese school
saw girls dressed in short skirts and long socks
saw guys in blouse and pants.
saw them running out of school
saw them gathering outside school
saw a mum patting a guy's back looking at a piece of paper.

looks so warmth.
looks so cartoon.
looks so like Japanese drama.
was i still in Singapore?

was on highway.
saw Singapore Flyer.
saw the tall buildings
saw esplanade.
saw the hotels.
saw the sea.
so nice.

sigh.
all the best for last paper tomorrow.
Mk will b happy mk tomorrow.

Tampines is so colourful.
P.s: Thanks for the 55min ride (:

low low low low low low low

2008-12-09T04:28:00.001-08:00

freaked out
panicked at RFA again.

this happens at every accounting paper.
:(

didnt finish my paper today.
was unsure almost throughout the whole paper.
just hope i can pass.

left MA paper on Friday.
one last paper before the new year,
it'll be back to work again.

sigh.
i've tried alot of times.
but so far, none worked out.
i'm tired already.
i think i want to give up for the time being.

i think im so vulnerable recently.
where did that strong mk go.
i hope she comes back soon.

Loving someone

2008-12-07T03:46:00.000-08:00

如果你不爱一个人,
请放手.
好让别人有机会爱她.

如果你爱的人放弃了你,
请放开自己,
好让自己有机会爱别人.

有的东西你再喜欢也不会属于你的,
有的东西你再留恋也注定要放弃的.
人生中有许多种 .
但别让自己为一种伤害.
有些缘分是注定要失去的,
有些缘分是永远都不会有好结果的,
爱一个人不一定要拥有,
但拥有一个人就一定要好好的去爱她.

男人哭了是因为他真的爱了.
女人哭了是因为她真的放弃了.

如果真诚是一种伤害,
我选择谎言;
如果谎言一种伤害,
我选择沉默;
如果沉默是一种伤害,
我选择离开.

如果失去是苦，
你怕不怕付出 ,
如果迷乱是苦，
你会不会选择结束,
如果追求是苦，
你会不会选择执迷不悟 ,
如果分离是苦，
你要向谁倾诉,
好多事情都是后来才看清楚,
好多事情当时一点也不觉得苦!!!!

emo-ing starts now.

2008-12-05T04:43:00.000-08:00

i feel fat.
i dont just feel fat,
i am fat -.-

i feel scared.
i dont just feel scared.
i am scared -.-

common tests starts tomorrow.
i dont feel really ready.
though i was quite productive today.

today is the last episode of Channel U 7pm show.
omg.
it's so nice.
and saddening.
:(

and i think im emo-ing cos of this.
sigh sigh sigh.
emos....

okays. off to do some revision paper.
byebye.
[lols. im not emo-ing lah! (:]

BLANK

2008-12-02T07:12:00.000-08:00

actually im feeling a little emo today.
it's like suddenly.
out of these few/many 'happy' days im having

maybe it's beecause i haven start revising
maybe it's because i still have elearning to do.
maybe it's because i didnt help in project today.
maybe it's because i listened to emo songs today.
maybe it's because i thought of you today.
whatever.

i think i sld stop.
FIT tutorial to do.
Bcomm analysis to do
RFA elearning to do.
before i sleep
and wake up at 7am tmr.

tomorrow, im so going to study!
i hope for sotlmn.
will there be someone ____________?
JIAYOU MK

bonjour!

2008-12-01T02:23:00.001-08:00

ello.
cava?
cava!

eegark!
lol.
it's actually Y in french.
(:(:(:(:

and J is G, G is J in french too.
H is arsh
and and U is fish in chinese!
hahas

French is quite fun.
their counting really makes me count.
70 is spoken as 60 10 (60+10)
80 is 4 20 (4X20)

i am vingt huit years old!
er. not sure if this is right.
i am recalling from what's left in my little otah.
hahas.

had my telephone graded assessment.
whew! *cold sweats*
hahas.

im happy. cos i finished 2 e-learning!
im sad cos i have 3 more to go.
and i havent start on revision!
HAVEN'T ah!!!

Ale Mk!!! (Come on MK)
Study~

maybe i can type in french next time so not many understands me.
hehs

jiayou all.

211108

2008-11-22T07:12:00.000-08:00

THANK YOU!
my father, candy, kee hong, pei yu, elaine, adrian, junhong, haiza, shirley, paul, wan ting, shi ting, shang yuan, geng bee, jiawei,hasanah, tze wen, gary, illias, envoys, jolinne, masliana, noel, angel

i had 1 cake this year all to myself! and i cut it myself (:
i had 2 surprises,
& i had 3 birthday songs!
=D

thanks alot for the gifts from
Hasanah, Haiza, Tze Wen, Shirley, Geng Bee, Kee Hong, Paul, Elaine, Jolinne..
the cake from Elaine
the surprise dinner and birthday song from Elaine, Jolinne, Kee Hong and Paul,
the surprise birthday song by BA Envoys.
and the birthday song from Shirley, Haiza and Tze wen (:

oh man.
it passed so quickly.
:(

oh yeah.
i love mahjong sessions too!

from elaine

spot Illias! lol. (Red Camp)

Mk, Hasanah

My Birthday cake.

Gifts (:

my nephew <3

eighteen

2008-11-20T09:05:00.000-08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SMK!
(:(:(:(:

i was actually dozing off at my comp when i heard the first sms ring at 12am.
hahas

anyway...
i wanted to blog at 12am sharp.
but i was doing my project..
so i decided to push it later.
tada!

im here.
though im still left with loads of things to complete,
i've decided to pack the day already.

hmms.
dont know what's my birthday wish,
but well. normal stuff.
happy, healthy, slimer, richer...

it's over already.
byebye seventeen :(
Hello eighteen!

eighteen sounds old -.-
LOL

oh yah.
i promised to blog bout u.
*waves*
HELLO ILLIAS!
hopefully u are reading?
lol

im not emo okays.
anyway, wish me Happy birthday hor.
hahas
x)

曹格-起床歌

2008-11-15T04:23:00.000-08:00

世界上只有开心是最重要
如果你要快乐就大声叫！！

sian ah!

2008-11-15T04:07:00.000-08:00

i ate 6 cold nuggets today.
cold as in refrigerated cold.
(:
just hope i dont get tummyache.
=x

i need to do my tutorials.
i need to finish up my IS ppt slides.
can i don't sleep tonight?
so i can clear everything?
*hopes*

i want to clear my stuffs.
school and personal.
my laptop's in a mess with files everywhere.
argh

okays.
i wan to slack abit again.
alamak mk!
so lazy.

...

2008-11-14T19:23:00.000-08:00

"clicks"
Happy Birthday Elaine!

IS Understanding Relationship Group

hearthrobS

2008-11-14T19:14:00.000-08:00

so many things to do..
but i am so unmotivated to touch them.
stared at the comp for hours,
walk about the house for umpteen rounds...
i can do anything but my supposed-to-do-work.
:(

*wargh!!!*

Hooray to all A and O level papers.
it's over (almost)
Enjoy yourself now and have a very very good break!
=D

i saw you that day.
and i felt fine (:
i guess this is good news.
and i went to look at photos just now
and i still felt fine. (: (:
i think this is better news.
i will be fine soon.
=)

next week's Red Camp.
next week's Bcomm assessment.
next week's IS presentation.
next week's MY BIRTHDAY!

i dont wan gifts.
i wan <3<3<3 LOL!!!

Happy birthday to my sister.
my family's back in m'sia.
im alone at home.
and that's why im so slack.
=x

CHEER UP!

WING IT!

2008-11-11T06:56:00.000-08:00

hahas.
my BCOMM teacher taught me to wing it.
cos we will always need to go with the flow in life
*spreads both hands out and tilts left and right*

OMG...
i have so... many things to do!!!
argh.
sians sians sians.
projects, projects and more projects.
Deadlines? im dead.

Common tests?
not ready! :(

and im so tired.
even after i allowed myself FULL 8hrs of sleep yesterday.
so feel like lying in bed till i wake up naturally and get tired of lying on my bed.
(: (: (:
some fantasizing to keep myself going.
=/

Jiayou to all A level people!
few more days? dont give up okay.
GO GO GO

*yawns*
Dining etiquette tomorrow.
i'll be brand manager for coca cola tomorrow.

i saw borneo motors. how i miss working there.
hahas

cant wait for this semester to be over,
then i'll be counting down to 1 more semester of studies before i wave ''byebye"
but will i really look forward to working life then? *waivers*

i just wish everything will stop at it's nicest.

Time machine

2008-11-09T06:59:00.000-08:00

I think I need some time by myself
Without anybody else
I just need to unwind
In my time machine
I need to go far away
A few years back would be ok
I just need to unwind
In my time machine

happy!

2008-11-09T06:02:00.000-08:00

wee~
like very long since i've blogged.
hahas.

hmms.
tomorrow will be the start of another drilling week.
:( so many things to do.
argh

weekends for me is better this week.
and i think studying full shift from 9-4pm is very good as i feel more
relaxed on Friday. YEAH!
so i think i shall stick to this.
(:(:(:(:

anyway..
Happy Birthday Elaine! =D
sleptover on Fri-Sat.
Elaine's bouncy springy bed is nice to sleep on. hahas

i cleared 2.5 of my tutorials on SAT!
hahas. so i slacked today, by going out =x
(shall touch on my projectS later.)
long since i've went out alone.
today i went town.
walked about looking at stuffs,
and i feel nice (:

maybe i should go out and get a breather once in a while.
(nods and agree to what i've just typed)

anyhow.. (hahas. quoted from karen quah)
i know i need to work hard...
and i know i need to wish all people taking
A LEVELS & O LEVELS to
HANG IN THERE!!!
jiayou okays.
soon you'll be enjoying, and i'll be mugging ):

mmm...
okay. i think im done typing.
im feeling rather good this week.
so i hope i can keep with this. or better!

alrights.
hope everyone else's feeling nice too.
CHEERS!

it's the counting down that makes my birthday most enjoyable (:

byebye

2008-11-01T08:14:00.000-07:00

Though you may not be reading this..
but this youtube video is for you.

hope you'll be strong.
though i dont know you well..
but reading abt what has happened really made me upset too.

a cheerful person i hope, wont become emo and lose hope on life cos of this.
you still must live everyday well okay.
so it puts that person dearest to you in peace.
Cheer up soon.

sigh.
life is really unpredictable; i agree.

anyway,
im living well this week.
caught a glance of something this week,
got abit upset, but was better till today.
all the best ya.
and no more small grey words from me bt that thing.

just now read an email on nice quotes/words...
one of them told me to not put in too much effort on 'that'
cos it comes when i least expect. hahas
so now.. relax.

okays.
i almost fainted today
feeling rather weak still
hahas
but i'll start on my tutorial soon. (hopefully)
(:(:(:(:

我还想他..

2008-10-25T10:01:00.000-07:00

'
林俊杰《我还想她》Lyrics
泪水将我淹没
到底谁该难过
究竟是谁放掉这段感情
我才终于明白
奔不到的承诺就成了枷锁
现实中幸福永远缺货

请告诉她我不爱她
笑着难过自我惩罚
想终止这一切挣扎
狠了心说着心谎话

别告诉她我还想她
恨总比爱容易放下
当泪水堵住了胸口
就让沉默代替所有回答

我才终于明白奔不到的承诺就成了枷锁
现实中幸福永远缺货

请告诉她我不爱她
笑着难过自我惩罚
想终止这一切挣扎
狠了心说着心谎话

别告诉她我还想她
恨总比爱容易放下
当泪水堵住了胸口
就让沉默代替所有回答

我不爱
我不痛
我不懂

我的心早已掏空
真心话言不由衷

请告诉她
我不爱她
笑着难过自我惩罚
想终止这一切挣扎
狠了心说着心谎话

别告诉她
我还想她
恨总比爱容易放下
当泪水堵住了胸口
就让沉默代替所有回答

别告诉她
我还想她
就让沉默代替所有回答
wo hen xiang ni. hen xiang hui dao guo qu.

loony

2008-10-24T07:45:00.000-07:00

whew. one week is over.
School's getting heavier..
this sem's 4projects.
:(

today work was no good
all very harsh people.

and on my train home i saw things that make me feel sick
people picking their teeth, opening their mouth big then still bring their
fingers to their nose. -.-
ya. after bringing in to nose, it goes in. LOL!!

okays. imh

you're gone

2008-10-22T09:14:00.000-07:00

Avril lavigne-When you're gone

hmms.
u occupied my mind these few days again.
but im still living happy.
hope u are too.
(:

week no.1

2008-10-17T07:51:00.000-07:00

first week in school was alright...
though in the first few days i was so tired due to working+studying..
but i'm feeling better now.

classes are alright..
my IS class wasnt what/how i expected it to be actually.
lols
not that i am thinking it to be way much more X rated or what.
but actually the module on Understanding Relationship is more on the emotional thingy too.
so it's somehow like psychology too.

Bcomm, i got a weird-crazy-funny-interesting teacher..
hmms.
"i am a child!"
hahas. hopefully i can score well in her class, since she's known to be strict.
=

Lectures are fine so far..
yep. fine. except that i realise i dont like LT68E now.
hard to concentrate and write properly with the small 'desk.'
but well.. it's part of my school life. hehs

i have the sudden urge to be more lady-like! lols
okay. dont be too shocked.
what i meant was i realise im more aware of my skin/complexion now.
and my weight.
so im spending some $$$ for some minor changes.
(:(:(:
of course, i hope there'll be some signs of changes.
or my $$$ are a waste. -.-

what else?
hmms
i want a happy family.
working didnt allow me to have enough time at home now,
especially between 7-9pm, where most or almost everyone is home and awake
and we usually talk abit.
(though not too much.)
so i kinda feel i've missed out on some things.
heard some things from my mum that day and it totally made me worrying till now.
i dont know how to say it, neither am i thinking of wanting to say it here.
but i just hope this time, it's my over sensitiveness again.
i don't want a broken one.

alrights.
off to study.
then watch a show.
the only actor i find 'cute' till now.
LOL.

new beginning. new mk. (:(:(:(:

2008-10-12T19:45:00.000-07:00

School's reopened!
alrights.
im determined to make myself look forward to a
whole new semester of more hard work and interesting stuffs happening,
so i'll be HAPPY~~
(:(:(:(:

Hmms.
I shall look forward to school,
work hard, study hard.
hopefully i'll stick to it.

i think im going to be rather busy,
especially till mid Nov,
but i'll hang in there.
for $$$$ =)

i hope i can take out time to update too.
but i think i can anyways.
cos blogging is a habit already.
hehs.

alrights
Cheer up everyone,
and JIAYOU!!

it's a new beginning for me.
though in my mind i've set some 'hopes'
i'll still take things in my stride.
concentrate on studies first.
Go Go MK Go.

2008-10-09T09:23:00.000-07:00

I know that many things are now cramped up in your mind, you are feeling depressed and empty. I am relieved that you would share them with me; at least it shows that our almost 4yrs friendship wasn’t a minute wasted (:

I’m sorry that many a times I just kept mum and could only listen to you talk. Maybe there isn’t anything that I am really capable of to help you, but, I’ve some things I want to say.

I hope to see the cloud above you clear soon. I know studies and a few more things are giving you a lot of headache/heartache. But no matter what, there will always be the sun after the rain. Rainbow, remember? These problems you are facing now may not be able to be solved overnight, but over time, they will find their own solutions. Try not to worry so much anymore.

You may feel that it’s impossible to see the results that you want, but we’ve gone through O Levels, SYF, and many other trials. You did it then, and have come this far. You can do it now again, and even better this time. Though I’m not taking the exams with you, my support is always there. Always.

Don’t be so harsh on yourself. I can see you’re already trying very hard.

Sorry I looked helpless looking at you pour your heart out every so often, but I did not let any word miss my ears. That day, I think I heard you choke on your tears as you swallow them. It didn’t make me feel good the whole day. I wanted so much to say that everything will just turn out fine for you. You just need that confidence in yourself. Say “I can do it”. But it didn’t come out of me that moment. I hope you’ll see this now.
I believe in you. Believe in yourself too.

Others may not be able to understand, but our friendship withstands more than these that I’ve said and I know you know I won’t ever throw you alone to fend for yourself. Though I cannot guarantee that I can solve your problems or make you feel much better, but I can promise you that I will make sure I’m there when you need me, you’re not alone facing these. It’s not just me, but many others beside you are wishing you well too. So don’t give up.

If I’ve faith in you, you must too.

I haven’t really asked you to give in to me before; this time, can I ask you to listen to what I’ve said just once? Don’t give up. Concentrate and go full blast for this last lap. You’ll come thanking me soon (:

“If ever there is tomorrow when we're not together.. there is something you must always remember. you are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. but the most important thing is, even if we're apart.. i'll always be with you.”
- Winnie the Pooh

New Soul- Yael Naim

2008-10-06T21:30:00.000-07:00

I'm a new soul
I came to this strange world
Hoping I could learn a bit but how to give and take
But since I came here, felt the joy and the fear
Finding myself making every possible mistake

La, la, la, la (21x)
La, la, la, la (21x)

See I'm a young soul in this very strange world
Hoping I could learn a bit but what is true and fake
But why all this hate? try to communicate
Finding trust and love is not always easy to make

La, la, la, la (21x)
La, la, la, la (21x)

This is a happy end
Cause you don't understand
Everything you have done
Why's everything so wrong

This is a happy end
Come and give me your hand
I'll take you far away

I'm a new soul
I came to this strange world
Hoping I could learn a bit but how to give and take
But since I came here, felt the joy and the fear
Finding myself making every possible mistake

New soul... (la, la, la, la,...)
In this very strange world...
Every possible mistake
Possible mistake
Every possible mistake
Mistakes, mistakes, mistakes...

sleepy

2008-10-06T21:21:00.000-07:00

yawns..*
so tired.
hahas.

10hrs sleep cant satisfy my exhaustion.
lols

School's reopening!
:) ):
happy sad.

work's still left with 1.5mnths to go..
rather loooongggg huh.

i don't know if i can cope with going to school then arriving at work
from 9am-9pm daily.
-.-

oh.
and it seems like people my age nowadays are facing a 'childhood' illness again-
toothach.
im getting it too!
the back of my mouth hurts, for what reason im not sure.
it's soreness.

is it the cause for my exhaustion?
rubbish.
hahas.
just my another excuse.

alright.
enough of blogging
off to rest then work-sour-work.
hahs.

I don't know where to begin
I don't know how to break
The bottle I'm living in
Do anything to take away
The memory of him
Can't you see that I have no way out
From leaving now?
-The Hush Sound; Medicine man

BBQ 04102008

2008-10-05T01:56:00.000-07:00

Pictures do the talking...

Happy happy day (:

urge.

2008-10-05T00:15:00.001-07:00

funny,
but i have this sudden urge to start anew altogether.
(:(:(:(:(:

wish me luck in making this happen.

update more later.

red button; replay

2008-10-03T08:31:00.000-07:00

every time i tried to press the red button to erase the memories inside me, i'll back out. and every so often, i'll still click the 'replay' button and make myself feel bad all over again.

i'm awaiting the day, i can be brave enough to click that red button without any hesitation and regretness.

that day may be the day when ifmabf.
which i so hope will come soon.

cos i dont want to go through this any longer.
this sucks

wo zhen de shou shang le

2008-10-03T08:04:00.000-07:00

boos

2008-10-03T07:48:00.000-07:00

BOO!!!!

sigh.
sigh
sigh
sigh
sigh
sigh
sigh
sigh
sigh
sigh
sigh
sigh...

sighs

why am i sighing?
i don't know.

so many's happening.
argh

sian ah!!!

nevermind.
tomorrow's BBQ.
must enjoy.

school's reopening.
dreads....
though at times i feel a tinnie bit of excitement.
:( bah. no no. not looking forward.

haish...
shit i cant stop sighing inside.

stop

Let's EMO!!!

2008-09-30T07:43:00.001-07:00

:(
i feel alot of pimples popping out on my face.
it's so scary.

on my back too.

and my heels are dry like shit.
argh

HAPPY CHILDRENS' DAY!
Happy Hari Raya Puasa!
HAPPY OCTOBER 1!!!

tomorrow seems like a day to rejoice over.
feel like going out tomorrow.
but no plans till now.
:( :( :(
boos

Before-After Famous

2008-09-25T21:34:00.000-07:00

hahas

Jay Chou looks rather thin and sickly before famous...

Taipei Modern Toilet Restaurant

2008-09-25T21:26:00.000-07:00

i find this disgusing. lol.

Let's go eat there if there's a chance

someday. hahs.

I know him so well (not)

2008-09-25T21:09:00.000-07:00

I know him so well Lyrics
Nothing is so good it lasts eternally
Perfect situations must go wrong
But this has never yet prevented me
From wanting far too much for far too long
Looking back, I could have done it differently
Won a few more moments, who can tell?
But it took time to understand the man
Now at least I know, I know him well

Wasn't it good, Wasn't it fine
Isn't it madness he can't be mine
But in the end, he needs a little more than before
Security, he needs his fantasy and freedom
I know him so well

No one in your life is with you constantly
No one is completely on your side
And though I move my world to be with him
Still the gap between us is too wide
Looking back, I could have played it differently
Learned about the man before I fell
But I was ever so much younger then

Wasn't it good (oh so good), Wasn't it fine (so fine)
Isn't it madness he can't be mine

Didn't I know how it would go
If I knew from the start
Why am I falling apart

Wasn't it fine
Isn't it madness he can't be mine
But in the end, he needs a little more than before
Security, he needs his fantasy and freedom
I know him so well
It took some to understand him
Hoo ooh I know him so well

Random post

2008-09-25T21:03:00.000-07:00

Extracted from an E-mail:

When a girl is quiet ... millions of things are running in her mind.
When a girl is not arguing ... she is thinking deeply.
When a girl looks at u with eyes full of questions ... she is wondering how long you will be around.
When a girl answers ' I'm fine ' after a few seconds ... she is not at all fine.
When a girl stares at you she is wondering why you are lying.
When a girl lays on your chest .. she is wishing for you to be hers forever.
When a girl wants to see you everyday... she wants to be pampered.
When a girl says ' I love you ' .. she means it.
When a girl says ' I miss you ' .... no one in this world can miss you more than that.

Life only comes around once make sure u spend it with the right person ....
Find a guy ..
who calls you beautiful instead of hot.
who calls you back when you hang up on him.
who will stay awake just to watch you sleep.
Wait for the guy who ... kisses your forehead.
Who wants to show you off to the world when you are in your sweats.
Who holds your hand in front of his friends.
Who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares about you and how lucky he is to have you.
Who turns to his friends and says, ' That's her!! '

1234567890

2008-09-24T23:29:00.000-07:00

coming online is so boring now.
=x
i got nothing to do.

after checking my mail,
go to my blog,
jump to a few others,
then nothing to do.
20min done.
argh

boreds.
need to go off to work again.
stress.

cos there's some "competition" going on.
haish.

in conclusion: earning $$$ is no easy.
:( bye guys.

i hope whoever's unwell now to get well soon.
prays.

dee ee pee are ee ass ass ee dee

2008-09-23T22:57:00.000-07:00

extracted from a webpage

10 ways to stop feeling depressed

http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/stop-feeling-depressed/

1.Understand the emotional cycle

2.Spend time with positive people

3.Reflect on past success

4.Focus on gratitude

5.Change of scenery

6.Break your routine

7.Interact with animals and nature

8.Get moving

9.Think about the big picture

10.Do something to help yourself.

sorry, but after reading it,

i wasnt in any way motivated to go and get myself feeling less depressed.

1. it's not that i dont want to understand my emotional cycle, but at times, it's just a mixture of a thousand things isnt it?

2. i get even more fed up thinking of who to ask for help.

3.what success have i made?

5. yeah. i hope i can have a change in this.

6. maybe i should. other than eat sleep eat sleep.

7. zoo?

8. get my brain to move to a new home maybe.

10. if i know what can help myself...

i wouldnt be feeling like this.

bleahs.

random!

went out with Elaine yesterday,

and there's so much we want to do again.

BBQ, Sleepover, picnic, go the the fishing place, 'high' tea, feast feast and feast etc.

waiting for Jolinne to come join in the fun after her promos...

Jolinne, HANG IN THERE!

i know you're feeling kinda pek chek now, with things not going the way you wanted.

but just dont give up yet.

hopefully things will get better okay.

i havent give up on you. i wont. so you cant also (:

{hugs}

actually, i really really hope to go back to the secondary school days.

but much as i hope, it wouldnt happen isnt it.

how could time possibly turn itself back.

but how fun were the days when i was silly enough to be less appreciative of them,

walking to school at the wee hours of the morning, going for my morning jog with Jolinne,

standing at the parade square for national anthemn,

being able to catch a glimpse of someone nice looking or your crush(lol),

then going to class and listening to the teacher talk, cracking jokes once in a while,

giggling over nothing with my friends, passing sweets around, doodle-ling(however you spell it),

talking over recess time, going for literature classes (aww..), then it's the end of school,

going for lunch together, then staying back to study together, CCA, or just slacking around...

ahh~

gone.

end.

misses. those memories.

ismy

2008-09-21T19:27:00.000-07:00

im so tired.
slept at 1.30 yeesterday.
woke up at 7.30
for IS enrolment.

shit.
i got into crazy classes this semester.
and i meant crazy.
the modules i initially wanted was
Photography and Psychology.
in the end as i was about to click 'psychology'
it disappeared.
and so did photography.

so i ended up taking
guess what?
Love and Sexuality and French
oh LOL LOL LOL

such a BIG change to my life.
i dunno to cry or smile.

well.
nevermind
though i'm getting those pre-school reopens jitters,
i think everything will be okay bah.
i'll just drag myself to school.

and not think of what's happened.
look forward. not look back.

i'll try to shut out those thinkings.
and get some sleep again after blogging,
and before i go pressing on the phone and saying
"Hello Good evening. may i speak to Mr/Ms XXX please?..."

yesterday work was not very good.
didnt make much sales myself
and made alot of blunders.
last week next week.
and i'll shall be thick skinned to call esplanade.

but i saw Dexter at work too.
hahas

im so looking forward to the end of Jolinne's Promos.
then it's feasting time.

i so feel like going to some place quiet.
soothing.
beach?
a night outside?
faraway place?
far far away??!

i've recently seen too much miseries/ problems
that i dont find life beautiful now.
so im trying to do something nice,
to let me know that it's still worth breathing.
lol
no no.
not going to commit suicide.
just want to say it out,
lest i explode one day.

anyway im feeling very fine.
serious.

just that i believe inside everyone's mind,
there'll be this voice saying all these negative things too?
the devil?
angel in disguise maybe.
i hope im not the only one hearing these.
=x

yesterday's
september 21.

dead

2008-09-19T07:55:00.001-07:00

what are these?

COFFINS!

which one would you want to spent your time lying in?

yawns

2008-09-17T21:52:00.000-07:00

hard night sleeping yesterday again.
haish.

i think im addicted to milk tea
and 'allergic' to milk tea too.

it makes my heart beat extremely fast
and i get very sleepless.
:(

shall try to drink lesser.

tomorrow's friday.
thankfully for the end to a week.
but

it seems to me that it wont be any much exciting.
would i be able to meet up with who i want to meet?
hahas
busy studying bah.

wounds dont heal as fast as i thought it would.

what a day

2008-09-17T07:35:00.000-07:00

chose my time table for next sem today.

lucky for me i got into the right class this time.

was a nerve wrecking time trying to get everyone into the same class.

and we did it! (:

TA25.

hope it'll be a nice class.

hmms.

http://www.ba-plmgss.blogspot.com/

the link to the mobile pod event i mentioned about in my previous post.

the pictures are in there.

rather crazy, but fun photos.

hahas

are you people hungry?

some pictures to make ur mouth water
(=

still craving for sushi though x)

how true-love is sweet in the beginning, but sour at the end :(

happy outside.not so within.

2008-09-15T08:27:00.000-07:00

alright.
i should be sleeping soon
or rather should be leaving my laptop alone soon..
cos i need to rest already.

dont want to have another sleepless night.

anyways..
Happy Belated Mid-Autumn Festival?
lols.
well.. this year didnt celebrate,
but spent my time standing at Picard,
selling handbags. sales was not bad though.
(:(:(:

yesterday's moon was covered by dark clouds when i looked up
while walking home.
:(

but today's moon is nice when i saw it along the path at Lakeside MRT
(: it's brightening up the sky..
and you can see the white fluffy clouds around it.
wanted to snap a picture..
but i got no camera phone already, so cant.
missed another nice photo.

i saw a beautiful sunset outside my door on Saturday too.
but couldnt locate anything that i can use to take photo at home
so missed it.

hmms.
anyway,
results are out,
YIPPEE i passed Costing.
(:(:(:
i just shouted "yay" when i first saw it.
hahas

frank to say,
i am quite happy to see my results.
but im not sure how will i feel after comparing with others..
cos till now i havent really asked around.

today was a hectic day.
woke up early in the morning..
braved the thunderous rain to NP,
then went to Paya Lebar Methodist Girls School
for Mobile Port by Envoys...
wow.
was rather fun
had a nice time taking 'jumping' photos.
a new hit pose now? hahs
anyways.

will post a picture or two up when i get the chance.
helping to set up a blog now so the pictures can be posted
and the girls will be able to see them (:

then.. went to City hall to collect my pay...
and went to work.
now im getting worried again,
after hearing that we are put under a one week trial again.
STRESSED AH!
-.-

i thought after being hired by the company itself,
we will practically be stucked there.
but it's not.
so well.
wish me very good luck.
i dont want to lose a job again.

alrights...
that should be all that i want to say?
yeah. think so.

hope all is well and striving hard,
HANG IN THERE!!!
keep smiling people.

one week since i last saw chicken and pig.
hahas :(
i miss you two!

i thought of you again.
ouch.

it's a mixture of a zillion things.

2008-09-13T05:08:00.000-07:00

i am so tired.
few days since i've slept for a full 8hrs.

as in...
i slept for 3 hours, i will wake up le
then i just keep tossing and turning
till i doze off at the break of dawn
then wake up again less than 1hr later.

this is killing me
i feel so dead.
0.-

i still have to work FULL tomorrow.
shit.

i tried to count down,
blank my mind..
all sorts.
but things just kept going into my mind.

what should i do.

my nephews are here.
and just now,
i sat on the sofa and totally stoned while looking at them play.
looking at everyone in my family moving about.
stone stone stoned.

there is some things/ something
that i need to settle.
but sorry.
due to fatigueness,
please be patient with me.
i will explain myself soon.
:(

hate feeling this way.

2008-09-11T23:06:00.001-07:00

my heart's thumping harder than usual
my hands' shaking like i've gotten a stroke.

wad's happening.

im nervous.
im reluctant.
im scared.
im worried.
i want.
i don't want.

i thought i've made up my mind yesterday.
but now i'm waivering again.
argh argh argh.

should i?
should i not?

i think i can back out after once.
but what if i can't?
would i be happy or sad after what's going to happen?
would i enjoy?

my mind wants.
but my heart's chicken.
so should i or should i not

wth.

it's another thing. nobody knows

2008-09-11T08:38:00.000-07:00

messed up.
haish
stupid me.

outta job

2008-09-09T21:38:00.001-07:00

argh
jobless.
jobless
jobless

:(:(:(:(

yesterday after we left our workplace..
received a sms that the project has been cancelled,
since we could not make significant improvement.

so much for me being little pleased over getting 2 appointments in 2days straight.

so people
im currently looking for jobs now..
any offers inform me okay.
(:
there's not much time left...
school's reopening.
and next week im going to receive my results

to dear Costing,
how are you?
please pass. please pass.

how is everybody now?
hope all is fine.
JC people jiayou!!

bored

2008-09-08T07:17:00.000-07:00

hmms.
i thought tomorrow will be
09092009
-.-

i was still thinking and reminding myself
to wish people happy 090909!
see how much i am looking forward for time to pass.
LOL.

erms.
work today was not bad..
my luck is not bad.
got 2 appointments. (:
hopefully i can hang on to this telemarketer job.
if not mk = ):):):

having super weird dreams recently.
lols.
dont want to say the contents here.
but one dream is somehow always related to the previous one.
lols.
must be i keep thinking of the previous dream everyday.
-.-

wake up mk.
hahas

im having these frequent dizziness again.
Argh

& i realized im updating pretty frequently
partially cos my TV at home is spoilt.
no shows to watch.
so i come online once i reach home.
and stay online till midnight,
and sleep late late the next day.
=x

packing up my stuffs since today..
will spread it over a few days.
got 3 more place to pack
but it's so messy im so reluctant.
oh well.
my mum will make sure she nags me till i packs.

craving!
im craving for...
cheesecake, sushi, alot alot of things.
cos im feeling hungry.
HUNGRY HUNGRY HUNGRY!
but i think it's too late to eat,
cos im sleeping soon.
so leave my stomach till tomorrow.
anyway i have enough fats to burn.
bah.

okays.
byebyes

just bored.
so here typing.

what would you do...

2008-09-07T08:19:00.000-07:00

What would you do if every time you fell in love with someone you had to say good-bye?
What would you do if every time you wanted someone they would never be there?
What would you do if for every moment you were truly happy there would be 10 moments of sadness?
What would you do if your best friend died tomorrow and you never got to tell them how you felt?
What would you do if you loved someone more than anything else and you could never have them?

saw these few questions on an e-mail i received.
the answer to all the questions is SAD SAD SAD.
lol.

just finished work
whew. my tired legs again. =(

i may be losing my job as a telemarketer very soon.
its like 90% confirmed?
but i will try to make that 10% happen.
hahas.

did some consideration...
if really i cant carry on as a telemarketer...
i will go back to be a promoter bah.
though i am having 3jobs now..
they are all irregular hours and after calculating..
it's about the same as working a regular 8hr job.
so...
ya. i'll decide tomorrow night bah.

though it's easy money...
but i guess it pays working the hard way?
bah.

JCs are all getting ready for their major exams..
i think it'll be hard for me to see them anymore...
i wish all of you all the best.
hang in there okay.
it'll be over soon.
work hard work hard.

i give u all my moral support.
and all my good lucks now.
i just hope i get a good job with good income.
this is the luck i need.
the rest...
take all you want!
(:(:(: hahas

2008-09-04T22:00:00.000-07:00

yawns***
bored.

it's almost one week since i've worked.
tomorrow will be returning to Bugis,
but my esplanade job has not replied me whether i need to report tomorrow.
and im so afraid to call him...
cos i already messaged him twice.
=x
sigh.

but anyway..
i'll be returning to Picard on sunday.

went back to read on september 2007 posts
just before i came to blogged..
things are not the same now.
but smhow... it still felt sweet reading the posts.
hahs.
if everything were to go back to how it was last year...
would i be happier than now?

oh anyways..
HAPPY BIRTHDAY SHI TING! :)

haish
internet is harmful.
cos i am unable to control my fingers
which will go click click click
on things i try not to click to see.
eg. friendster or msn.
hahas.

okokok
one short paragraph from my post last year
was to control my feelings,
and when they take the better of me..
i must shake shake shake it off,
and shut it OUT!
no more thinking.

next thursday
i'll try to make it the last message.
i'll try very hard.

JIAYOU ALL
Take care (:(:(:

love story

2008-09-04T21:31:00.000-07:00

[[ kathel ]] seek .

Departure.

Friends

下一站，幸福 我以為

Life?

Joan Jett - I Hate Myself For Loving You

Jiayou

2010

diet

Always there for u

Introducing TIPMedia.Net!!

i feel i've grown up.

What do you see?

郭静《在树上唱歌》

be careful people

the wait is over!!

TGIF

colour woof

down.

not blogging

new

i had a weird dream.

done

'Bpull'

count

dino, cheer me up.

dino is heart

why am i emo-ing

the day of love

Black 13. but yellow for me (:

omg~

French Time!

sudden urge to speak (to you)

Pancake day

VIDEOS!

1st February

i love you

toy food

moo year is here.

WHAT A DAY

WAARRGGGHH!!!!

need a breather

all washed out

ARGH!

i miss you two

short sighted?

two zero zero nine

i am old already!

WT** is Wrong?

you people are <3!!!

i was thinking of u today.

shuddup

low low low low low low low

Loving someone

emo-ing starts now.

BLANK

bonjour!

211108

eighteen

曹格-起床歌

sian ah!

...

hearthrobS

WING IT!

Time machine

happy!

byebye

我还想他..

loony

you're gone

week no.1

new beginning. new mk. (:(:(:(:

New Soul- Yael Naim

sleepy

BBQ 04102008

urge.

red button; replay

wo zhen de shou shang le

boos

Let's EMO!!!

下一站，幸福我以為